For I think of us more as flowers in the attic. 'Open the Window and Stand in the Sunshine.' Yet, I hesitate to name our story that. And as I begin to copy from the old memorandum journals that I kept for so long, a title comes as if inspired. If none of these predictions come true, not only will I be losing quite a bit of money, but the good people at will be hearing from me.'It is so appropriate to color hope yellow, like that sun we seldom saw. After a lengthy investigation, the culprit will be identified as the Jimmy John’s manager, who was using it as a guerilla marketing campaign to drum up more interest in his store since most students prefer Chipotle. Someone will begin breaking and entering into South Campus apartments, but not taking anything, leaving only Jimmy John’s delicious footlong sandwiches. According to my visions, no one applied, with students citing, “it’s Idaho” as their primary reason.ħ. SU’s newest domestic program, SU Idaho, will not be successful. The Crouse Chimemasters will butcher their rendition of Jack Harlow’s “First Class.” Why would someone think that Jack Harlow’s masterpiece could be properly chimed? Only time will tell.Ħ. But you didn’t need a psychic to tell you that.ĥ. Out with legs, in with overpriced death scooters!Ĥ. Instead, students will have to use VEO scooters to get to and from classes. My visions have confirmed that walking will be banned on campus. However, do not fret, dear reader-it’s not like you were getting any to begin with.ģ. According to my vision, the Marshall Street Preacher will ban all forms of sexual contact on campus.

This disturbing vision came to me in a dream. The Marshall Street Preacher will take over for Chancellor Kent. In my visions, the ancient book pages will be used as napkins for customers to wipe their greasy fingers on.Ģ. Acropolis wasn’t enough for the hungry corporate elites at Popeyes- the whole third floor of Bird Library will be converted into the popular fast food restaurant chain. An entire floor of Bird Library will be converted into another Popeyes. Here are my predictions as an amateur psychic for what might happen this year at Syracuse:ġ. With great power, however, comes great responsibility, and it is my obligation to the entire Syracuse student body to share the visions I have seen so far in my psychic career. While most of you wrote your little emails and hopped on your boring Zoom calls, I was hard at work Googling how to become a psychic.Īfter several deep dives into the internet, I was suddenly able to see the future. Over the summer, while some of you pretended to be more successful than you are on LinkedIn, I was busy becoming a psychic.

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The Little Psychic by V.C. Andrews